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hot take: we should have kid-friendly pride AND also 18+ pride

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✅ twice as many prides

✅ young kids get a place where they can see and meet people from all across the rainbow, which is completely separate from...

✅ adults having a place where they can literally fuck in the streets if they want, c’mon it’s fucking pride

i can’t imagine another example where the totality of a human’s existence is expected to fit such small singular confines, so why on earth do we do that with pride

it’s not pride unless people of every age, background, and social group can be involved

it’s not pride unless people are free to fully express their gender/sexuality by whatever means they choose

if you think these two statements are incompatible i don’t want you planning my pride

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hot take: we should have sex-positive pride AND also sex-sensitive pride

hear me out

✅ twice as many prides

✅ consenting adults get a place where they can be as radically sexually queer and free, completely separate from...

✅ people having a place to celebrate all of queerness in a content-safe and trauma-free environment

basically the same toot as before. earlier i'd couched it in the context of "kid safety" which is admittedly reductive and somewhat infantalizing, so here it is again

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@red pride during the day & pride after dark? Idk if they do this anywhere, where I've been to pride it's ONLY a day thing when it vould also b @ night

@NLS i’m guessing they probably do something like this somewhere, and while it’s probably better than nothing, it does still relegate sexuality to the literal darkness

@red dude! Summer of Sodomy has been cancelled this year.

@red I like this phrasing better tbh, it's not just "what about the kids" it's about consent for people of all ages.

@caymanwent ya there’s a lot of discourse about kids at pride, but not necessarily for the right reasons. it’s easy to get people’s attention with that framing, but like you say it’s just one facet of a bigger issue

@red I like calling this kind of thing "sex positive" vs [something else] so adults who want the latter don't feel like they're being called immature (not a callout, to be clear)

@rockario @red it's tough to include grey/ace/demi folks without giving in to the whole "concealing gay sex is het prudishness" angle, but I think we're big enough to be able to separate those spaces

@caymanwent @red Totally, language and communicating this idea seems to be hard without some folks getting frustrated or worse, but I believe in us.

@rockario people frame "we should be able to fuck in the streets" and "keep it chaste for the kiddos" as a weird sort of binary, never thinking that maybe having different spaces (as most prides do) could be valid. Albeit those spaces can still be problematic.

@red Here there is apparently the afternoon pride where it's safe and the evening/night pride where it seems to be more sexual (and so I haven't went…).

@lanodan i like that it's just evening pride and not night-only. a lot of people think relegating queer sex to "only in the dark" counts as liberating??

@red I disagree. This idea is separation. Some people on the ace spectrum are excluded from the sex-positive pride. It is also not very nice for children, this idea risks less adults attending to the safe pride.

@red yeah, which biases are showing in what? I didn't expect to be unbiased. I'm saying I don't like the idea.

@ella @red one of my friends is sex-sensitive ace, and knowing them, I'm pretty sure they'd be happy that there was a sex-sensitive pride *so long as it wasn't considered second-fiddle and neglected*
(but they'd have to be asked directly to be sure)

@red

I think that's a great idea :D

probably infinitely harder to get permits / consent from everyone who resides in the location / adjacent buildings / neighborhood for the sex-positive one if it's in a city, though XD

maybe it should be out in the country like burning man? :3

(just replace burning with f—you get the idea XDD )

@red While it's important to have places to freely explore and celebrate one's sexuality, I really don't think pride is the right situation for that! Many LGBT+ adults don't like sex and wouldn't be comfortable with something like this, but they still belong at pride.

@socks you're not the first person to respond with this take

i literally don't understand why you would object to having exactly the kind of pride you want, but that's your bullshit to deal with tbh

@red Because... I'm not the only person in the world and I care about my LGBT+ friends too...?

Like, I would totally be fine with people fucking wherever they want, but I know many people who would be uncomfortable with it, and by setting up something like this they'd be effectively excluded. I don't think this is THAT hard to understand...

@socks pride isn't "wherever they want" it's literally a specific event on a specific day and time for a specific purpose

but feel free to continue arguing against a point that i'm not making

@red
This made me remember a work colleague who was cross because Pride was celebrated on different days in different cities.

@floppyplopper what?? do they not like attending *more* prides???

in a perfect world every city would have at least two prides and they would be celebrated on varying days each year to maximize the number of prides people could attend throughout the year in their area

murder 

@red
The Pride she (a straight woman) was complaining about was to commemorate the life of Michael Causer.

I didn't give her a lecture. I'd already given up by this point.

@floppyplopper oh good yes we definitely need more straight people putting restrictions on when/where pride can happen. that's definitely what pride is about

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moon holiday

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